Do you struggle with setting boundaries in your personal life or at work?
We all have boundaries but not everyone is aware of them.
Burnout is a sign that you are suffering from unhealthy boundaries.
Often women ,highly sensitive people, empaths struggle with boundary issues. Also people with tendencies to perfectionism or people pleasing. And in a professional context the topic of boundary setting is significant to lern for people who serve/treat/support other people such as coaches, therapists, counselors, doctors, medical professionals, Yoga teachers, any teacher, social worker
Today I want to talk about boundaries - healthy boundaries!
I have shared on Social Media the past weeks quite a few posts on the topic boundaries.
This topic is very dear to my heart and essential in todays world from my perspective. Social Media , home office, the intense changes in the world over the past three years are all circumstances that have challenged our awareness of boundaries and boundary practice.
Why is it important to have healthy boundaries?
Simple and short answer:
Because examples such as burnout, depression, compassion fatigue, anxiety, loss of vitality, body symptoms such as neck or back tension can be the result of a lack of healthy boundaries.
Healthy boundaries are the foundation of health and well-being.
More than 70% of U.S. adult workers report feeling “tense or stressed out” at work, and about 3 in 5 say this stress negatively impacts their workday, according to the American Psychology Association (APA,2021).
Too much work, overdoing, inappropriate and overuse of our five senses, unfulfilled desires, unhealthy diet, lack of movement, lack of sleep or disrupted sleep …these are a few factors and causes that lead to feeling stressed,feeling burned out, and ultimately a loss of vitality
Burnout ist often related with the workplace, but also appears in parents, caregivers, therapists, coaches, teachers, teenagers, medical professionals of all kinds ….
Burnout often hit Highly Sensitive People and Empaths.
Burnout is an accumulation of stress related ailments and lack of setting healthy boundaries.
In my former career as an Osteopathic and Naturopathic Practitioner and my current profession as a Holistic Health Coach and Ayurveda Health Counselor and Psychology Student I got in touch with this topic of burnout and boundaries many times and in all kind of different ways.
Today I will let you see a bit into my personal life and share with you my reflection about the impact of unhealthy boundaries.
In my own personal life experience as a highly sensitive women, and empath the topic of boundaries is like a puzzle.
Over the course of years the puzzle pieces came together and making more and more sense to me.
As I think back the lack of boundaries was often the source of my greatest heartbreaks, frustrations, setbacks, tensions and pain in my body, as well as feelings of exhaustion and stress.
Our body and mind knows when we have too much.
Unfortunately we often miss to listen deeply to ourselves and fight against the signs and messages the body sends. The signs and messages of our body and mind are signs that want attention and telling you "hey, something in your current life is not working the way it used to work. Something needs to change - change of habits is needed".
Ask yourself what do I need? Ask your body - what do you need? And then listen!
We all have stress, BUT we all respond differently to it. According to Ayurveda how we deal with stress, anger, body challenges, psychological burden differs from individual body - mind constitution to body- mind constitution.
It is life changing to discover on a deeper level what boundaries in your different areas of life look like. It is awakening to notice the different areas of your life in which you may hold weak/poor boundaries, rigid boundaries, or flexible boundaries. It is empowering to explore and learn setting healthy boundaries.
No matter what area in your life you feel overwhelmed, stressed or maybe burnt out there are steps you can feel better and prevent it to happen or to happen again
4 Tips to protect yourself from mental and physical depletion and instability:
Tip #1 - Benefits of boundaries?
Boundaries improve health.
Boundaries improve relationships.
Boundaries improve self-esteem.
You may want to pause here and take some time to reflect on who influenced your boundaries?
Tip #2 - What do you need?
Tuning into our body and needs is a way of raising awareness. We need to raise awareness when it comes to learn healthy boundary setting.
You can begin with observing yourself mindfully and your mental and physical condition and live according to your individual needs.
Ask yourself every day what do I need?
Then listen and get, if possible what you need.
Tip #3 - Take care and balance the overused five senses
Overuse or misuse of our five senses is very common in these days and the main cause that lead to disease. It is because we miss setting healthy boundaries towards ourselves by not taking care of a moderate use of our senses.
Examples to give your senses a break:
*Take screen breaks - just get up and move your body a bit.
*Take 5 deep breaths every three hours.
*Listening to some calming music
*Notice how do you feel here right now and repeat this several times a day
*Notice the taste of what you are eating. How does it taste?
Tip #4 - Why is it hard to set boundaries?
No one taught us how to set boundaries. We were not encouraged to set healthy boundaries. It is often an unfamiliar territory for us.
Because of this I recommend to educate yourself about boundaries and set the foundation with a professional first. This may not what you want to hear but I'm very transparent with you and advise to reach out to a professional to work on boundaries. The field of boundaries is so complex and can create all kinds of feelings.
Self help books, articles, watching videos on Instagram, TikTok or Youtube are all great but may not be enough and to be transparent again, I often question the quality of the shared contents..
It is like building a house - you want to start with a solid foundation.
Setting boundaries is both challenging and empowering.
Sometimes we just need a professional who supports us on a deeper journey of transformation and holds us accountable, celebrates and acknowledges us on this profound journey of boundary issues
I offer 1:1 Customized Coaching Packages - 3 Sessions
Please reach out if you need support and send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org. I will give you more information.